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Become Her Man

Efficient Dating Systems
Made in Germany


Finally discover
how to get and keep an attractive girlfriend
who’ll love you for who you are…

Using the very first Efficient Dating Systems Made in Germany

Without being extremely good-looking, rich, or charming…
It works for short, shy, and bald guys as well. My clients didn’t believe it until they experienced it firsthand, so I understand if you’re still suspicious.

Stop thinking what to text her:

Just steal my best Conversation
to get her interested in you

(and keep it for yourself)

becomeherman conversation starter

Get 7 real-life examples you can immediately copy/paste to start flirty conversations with attractive women on apps like Tinder, Instagram, Facebook, and even in real life!

Proven through a decade of testing by my clients, myself, and soon you.

I know you’ve been promised many things in the past that didn’t work out the way you expected. So to avoid this and to start on the right foot, will you allow me to ask you a few questions to make sure this website and my services are truly for you? That way, you can make your own decision freely, to know if they’re what you’re looking for or not…

Is This You?

If this is you, then I have some good (and bad) news for you…

Why has dating become so complicated?

Let’s start with the bad news. It was never as difficult for single men to find their significant other as it is today. Here’s why:

Reason 1:
There are way more single men between the ages of 25-45 than single women

That’s what the Pew Research Center reported in 2020. In fact, 51% of all men between 18-29 in the US are single. But for women, it’s only 32%.

become herman adults who are single demographic groups
become herman adults who are single demographic groups

There are far LESS single women than single men in the U.S.
Put simply: “There aren’t enough lids for all the pots”

The shocking truth: There are at least 2 men competing for a woman’s attention.

And it’s even worse if you’re a single man above 30. First, you have to compete for her attention with younger men. Second, there are fewer single women between 30 and 40 than in any other age range. 

And it’s not just in the United States. According to Forbes and the Times, it’s a global and growing trend.

Reason 2:
Elders no longer teach young men how to become attractive to women.

My dad was married by the age of 21 but when I was 21, I couldn’t even say hi to a woman without having a few drinks first. It’s not the best example of rock-solid, unshakeable, and grounded masculine confidence, right?


I hate to admit it but I’m jealous of my dad. When he was a teenager, the older guys in his neighborhood showed him how to act around women. And when he got older, he did the same with the new kids on the block. It was like a torch being passed on from generation to generation.


But he never sat me down and taught me how to behave around girls. When I asked him why, he replied, “I assumed your older brother or his friends would teach you.” I’m sorry dad, but those times are long gone.

Reason 3: Society is sending you mixed signals about genders, sexual identities, and what it means to be a man.
become herman men are trash shirt product

Here’s a screenshot of Etsy.com. T-shirts, sweaters, stickers, cake decorations, and phone cases with the same slogan are also being sold on Amazon and other sites. 

Meanwhile, media outlets such as Vice magazine and the New York Post reported that the Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelesnkyy became an instant sex symbol for many women worldwide for staying in Ukraine to fight the Russians instead of running away like a coward: “The fight is here; I need ammunition, not a ride.“  He embodies all the qualities that some would label as “toxic masculinity.”

At no point in history were young men so confused about what it means to be a man. And scientific research shows this confusion also affects men physiologically. Testerone levels show a steady decrease among young men, and the sperm count among western men has dropped by over 50 percent since 1973.  

Reason 4: Women don’t know what they want anymore.”

Men are not the only ones suffering from this… “Where have all the good men gone?” is such a common phrase among women that there are popular songs and books about it. 

Multiple studies have shown what women truly want in a man. Women are attracted to character traits primarily associated with being a man: discipline, ambition, and not giving a f*ck attitude. This desire seems so deeply rooted that some studies even suggest women can smell if a man has those personality traits or not. 

But then the same studies also show women also want a kind man. No wonder you’re confused; do you have to be strong or kind? Should you embrace your masculinity or your inner emotions? If you’re lost, you aren’t alone. It seems like even women don’t know what to pursue anymore. Should they focus on their career or on their love life? Or both? 

Reason 5:
Traditional education doesn’t teach you about dating, sex, and love. 

School doesn’t teach you how to behave like a man anymore. There’s sex ed but the biggest insight you’ll get there is how to put a condom on a banana. And clubs like the boy scouts – the largest youth organization that helped shape boys into men for over a century – are now admitting girls as well

This is despite the girls already having an organization of their own since 1912 (girl scouts). But as of now, they don’t accept anyone who identifies as a boy. Tell me who’s being discriminated here?

become herman thats suspicious

No wonder so many boys are growing up without a clear definition of what it means to be a man. Even some female teachers have pointed this out in a New York Times article.

Reason 6: Absence of rituals that turn boys into men

Modern society doesn’t require men to undertake a rite of passage. In the past, these rites were designed to teach men valuable survival skills and to test their strength and resilience. If a boy successfully completed these rites, there would be a ceremony marking his transition from boyhood to manhood. Renowned professor Robert L.Moore has described this in detail in his book, The Archetype of Initiation.

Also in most countries, men don’t have to serve in the military to learn about focus, strength, discipline, and risk-taking. Many credible studies in evolutionary biology have confirmed that these qualities are attractive to women. 

So it’s not surprising that surveys show men today are having much less sex as compared to previous generations. Experts in psychology blame this trend on young men taking much longer than they should to grow up. But how can they blame you if society lets you grow up confused? Speaking of society…

Reason 7: Society is pressuring you and shaming you for being ignorant about things you were never taught.

Divorce rates and single-mom households have increased significantly so many boys grow up without a reliable masculine role model.

The worst part is… society still expects you to know how to attract a woman, maintain a healthy relationship, and be an extraordinary lover just because you have a d*ck. And if you can’t do it, then people shame you and assume something’s wrong with you. But how can you learn something that nobody taught you? It’s like assuming any guy can fix your car just because he’s male… I definitely can’t. 

Reason 8:
What used to work for your dad or grandpa won’t work for you anymore.

The stereotype of men as breadwinners and women as homemakers is virtually a thing of the past. In many countries, including the US, more women than men have jobs…

become herman women and men employees percentage of total employees
In the US, women outnumber men in the workforce so they’re
no longer forced torely on them for financial security like
they used to.
This means for the first time in history, women don’t have to date, settle down, and put up with someone just for financial security. She can decide who to date and be in a relationship with based solely on how attracted she is to a man. So you have to bring your A-game whereas your dad and grandpa could make way more mistakes and still get (and keep) the girl. 

Reason 9:
Online dating is much harder for men than for women

Online dating comes with a catch that dating apps like Bumble or Tinder don’t want you to know. According to Statista, Tinder consists of 75.8% male and 24.2% female users. 

become herman districbution of tinder monthly active users united states march 2021 by gender

There aren’t enough women on Tinder for every guy to get a match.


The stereotype of men as breadwinners and women as homemakers is virtually a thing of the past. In many countries, including the US, more women than men have jobs…

become herman women and men employees percentage of total employees

And if you think Bumble’s any better, I have bad news for you. Statista shows that 67.4% of Bumbles users are men while only 32.6% are women. This isn’t surprising given that there are more single men than women in the U.S. So don’t expect to find a dating app or site with more women than men. 

become herman districbution of bumble monthly active users united states march 2021 by gender

Online dating is hard if you don’t know how to compete against the droves of guys who want the same thing as you.

In other words, if you don’t know how to stand out from all the other guys competing for her attention, you’re doomed to fail at online dating before you even start swiping. 

Reason 10:
Too much MISINFORMATION… if it worked, you wouldn’t be reading this right now.

Movies, TV shows, and magazines constantly bombard you non-stop with ideas on what women truly want. And your male friends just repeat the same advice they keep seeing on TV. I’ve actually tried it all… I lost fat and gained muscle, bought a fancy car, and made my social media profiles seem like my life was always amazing. You wanna guess what results I got from all that? Nothing.

Also, whenever I’d asked women for dating advice, most of them would say: “Treat her nice and just be yourself.” Every time I did it that the girl would end up with a guy who was doing exactly the opposite; being an a**hole.

And don’t even get me started on the dating industry. I respect everyone and don’t want to talk badly about my profession but unfortunately, there are way too many dating coaches, too many relationship courses, too much information… and a lot of it is useless.

Like in any profession, some “experts” are giving incomplete or false advice. I’ve  been working in the dating industry for over a decade and many of my clients had worked with other coaches but didn’t get the results they wanted. Usually, it boiled down to the following reasons:

  1. A lot of coaches are very clever marketers. This means they never had to improve their coaching skills because they could just get new clients instead of listening to feedback from the dissatisfied ones. For the first 8 years of my career, I got clients by referral only which forced me to deliver results. Otherwise, I’d go broke.

  2. Many “dating gurus” usually sell you a partial solution. It works just enough to give you hope… so you keep buying every new product they sell, thinking it’s the next piece of the dating puzzle.
  3. Doing something well and teaching others how to do it require two completely different skill sets. Some coaches are experts in attracting amazing women themselves but just can’t teach it to other men.

  4. There are many coaches who are really great teachers and highly motivated to help you succeed, but what they teach works only in theory or for guys who have the same personality as they do For example, a famous influencer with millions of followers can teach you something believing it’ll work for you but you’re not a celebrity, so it won’t. They may have the best intentions, but what truly matters are results.

I hope you’re not too depressed because here’s the good news… You didn’t know what was holding you back from getting the woman of your dreams…until now. Here’s your chance. Will you take this opportunity, fully grasp it, and seize it with your hands? 

Or will you join the millions of men who never take advantage of opportunities and just complain about their bad luck later? You have no excuses anymore. The choice is yours, choose wisely!

Discover patterns and secrets most men will never know about women and dating

Hi, I’m Herman the German, inventor of Efficient Dating Systems Made in Germany. As a former “nice guy,” I suffered a lot until I got fed up with always seeing everyone but me get the girl. I went from being rejected to attractive women consistently saying “yes” to me. And it wasn’t just a fake yes anymore; they really, deeply, and absolutely wanted to go out with me.

become herman coaching

Me giving an interview in Cologne 2015.

But it was a long and painful journey to discover what really works… involving countless embarrassing rejections and mistakes, studying over 414 books, and taking three loans (19,609.87 Euros) to pay for various self-help seminars.

My goal is to save you time and avoid the frustration I had to endure on this journey. And to offer my experience…

To help you get the following results:

How do I know my Efficient Dating Systems will work for you? Because I rely on…

The Power of Pattern Recognition
(Data doesn’t lie)

become herman tony robbins

“There are patterns of success and patterns of failure. The good news is, success leaves clues.”

– Anthony Robbins
best-selling author of 65 million self-help books and audio products, and a renowned life coach whose client list includes Leonardo Di Caprio, Nelson Mandela, Princess Diana, Bill Clinton, and many others. Here’s Anthony Robbins with his client Ophrah Winfrey.)

“Human personality is a predictable and consistent science” 

– Jordan Peterson, Ph.D. (World-renowned professor, clinical psychologist, and best-selling author whose books have sold more than 30 million copies worldwide. According to Google Scholar his body of work appears in more than 10,000 scientific peer-reviewed articles.)

become herman Jordan Peterson
become herman einstein

“Without changing our pattern of thought, we will not be able to solve the problems we created with our current patterns of thought” 

– Albert Einstein, Ph.D. (Nobel prize-winning physicist who’s regarded by most scientists as the smartest person who has ever lived.)

“The human mind is an incredible pattern-matching machine.”

– Jeff Bezos (Founder of Amazon.com and one of the richest people in the world with a net worth of 166.6 billion dollars as of 2022.)

become herman jeff bezos
become herman deepak chopra

A person is a pattern of behavior, of a larger awareness. A person is a pattern of behavior, of a larger awareness.

– Deepak Chopra M.D  (The first medical doctor to scientifically create a bridge between western and eastern medicine. He’s also written 91 books on spirituality and alternative medicine, selling over 20 million copies worldwide.)

“Personal Growth can actually be quite scientific. Our values are our hypotheses: this behavior is good and important; that other behavior is not. Our actions are the experiments; the resulting emotions and thought patterns are our data.”

– Mark Manson (Three-time #1 New York Times bestselling author whose books have sold over 14 million copies worldwide. His work has been translated into more than 65 languages and hit bestseller lists in sixteen different countries. He also writes one of the most visited self-help blogs in the world, with over 15M+ visitors, every month.)

become herman mark manson
become herman tom bilyeo

Pattern Recognition is a key part of a growth mindset. You must be curious and open to seeing the patterns so you can move forward with learning skills that will help your overall growth.” 

– Tom Bilyeu (Founder of Quest Nutrition, a 1B+ dollar company. He’s also a co-founder of Impact Theory, a Youtube channel with almost 3 million subscribers dedicated to empowering people by sharing advice from elite entrepreneurs, athletes, celebrities, and scientists. Here he is next to A-list movie star John Travolta.)

People operate from a place of Repetition Compulsion and it’s this repetition of behavior that creates patterns.”

– Siegmund Freud, M.D, Ph.D (Founder of Psychoanalysis and the father of modern psychology)

become herman sigmund freud

What happens if you hold an apple high above your head and let it go? It will fall to the ground. If you do it a thousand times, it will fall a thousand times. In other words, a pattern emerges and we call it gravity. Gravity impacts all of us even if we don’t understand how it actually works.

Patterns also emerge in dating and relationships. They’re present whenever a man interacts with a woman he’s interested in even if he’s not aware of them.

You can’t argue with nature because nature always wins. Just like how Newton didn’t invent gravity but discovered it, I didn’t invent dating and relationship patterns… I discovered them.

I’m a certified financial engineer so I’m trained in spotting even the most hidden pattern. I’m also very analytical and logical. I’m German. I’m the opposite of romance and seduction but I turned this weakness into a strength by focusing on results and efficiency.

“But every girl is different.” Sure, but doesn’t every girl have to drink water, eat, and breathe? Just like she has physical needs, she also has a need for safety, love, and belonging. This isn’t an opinion, it’s been proven by researchers, sociologists, and famous psychologists such as Abraham Maslow, B. F. Skinner, and Esther Perel, to name a few.

Now that you’re aware dating patterns exist, you have a choice to make. You can try to discover them yourself or learn from the 1000 experiments I’ve already conducted to figure out what does and doesn’t work in dating and relationships.

Why Learn From Me?

“Only a fool learns from his own mistakes. The wise man learns from the mistakes of others.”

– Otto von Bismarck (Founding father of Germany and its first chancellor, in 1871)

become herman coaching

Here I am giving a speech in Berlin on how to approach a woman naturally.
It was in 2012 and I was invited as an expert to share my knowledge and experience

But don’t take my word for it; here’s what my clients have to say about me…

Here’s what smart guys – just like you – had to say after applying my Efficient Dating Systems:

become herman wedding

Nadira K, Civil Engineer, 39 years old, Brisbane, Australia

“I was hopeless when it came to women. But after training I was able to go for girls I like without being afraid of anything. And as a 39 year old, I got married to my 26 year old dream woman. This is what happens when you get coaching with B. Herman.”

become herman customer

Tony L, Entrepreneur, 30 years old, Paris, France
“With what you shared with me, I feel deep down that I’m enough.


I just feel masculine by being myself and women feel it and are attracted to it. Before I talked to a girl I felt rejected and afraid she’ll only like me for my money but now I feel she likes me for who I am. Thank you B. Herman I’m very grateful.”

become herman customer

Ryan S, Banker, 28 years old, Heath and Reach, UK 

I went from one to two dates a year to one or two dates a week. Changing from trying to impress to actually being the guy who wants to be impressed.”  

become herman customer

Michael A, Insurance Salesman, 23 years old, Stuttgart, Germany 

“I couldn’t stop smiling out of happiness after training. You can impress beautiful women and get them to go on dates with you by just being who you are. Who you are as a person doesn’t change but you just get the courage to express what you always wanted to say. Once you get it everything changes.”

To see what other students have said about my systems: click here

I don’t want you to invest in my training without being fully convinced. That’s why to earn your trust, I’ve written a few solid pieces… You be the judge…

What do you want to work on today?
Here’s my client Vincent before and after his transformation. On the right, you can see him CONFIDENTLY attending a 4th of July party at the Playboy Mansion (when Hugh Hefner was still alive).
If there’s one thing that all women find attractive, it’s confidence. Unfortunately, most people (even coaches) don’t understand how confidence actually works and how to develop it. Read these articles to start developing and becoming the kind of man women are naturally attracted to.
My client Ken went from a shy introvert to being voted the most attractive man in his hometown in 2017.
Learn how to attract and date the woman of your choice. If she doesn‘t feel attracted to you, you‘ll never be more than “just a friend” to her. Learn how to help her feel the gut-level attraction that keeps her wanting more…
Here’s a screenshot of my client Alexander’s Tinder inbox. It’s the girl who asks him out shortly after they start texting. 
Get specific, step-by-step instructions on how to consistently match with attractive women and get them to say yes to a date with you. Turn your smartphone into your best wingman with these articles.
Here’s my client Timo getting a girl’s phone number in a department store.
Discover how to meet women in almost any situation and ask them. Check out these cutting-edge articles that’ll teach you what you should and shouldn‘t do when meeting women.
My client Daniel cuddling with his girlfriend and their dog.
Find out how to get a girlfriend who’ll love you for who you are. These articles will teach you how to make her your one and only, even if you‘ve been friends for years.
becomeherman conversation starter

Don’t forget to claim your welcome gift:

“A unique conversation starter to make almost any woman interested in you”

(Works both online and in real life, as you’ll see once you use it)

Even the best guys who understand women can still learn new things:

Discover the 5 powerful psychological triggers every opening message needs to get almost any woman interested in you instantly.

Plus: get seven real-life examples you can immediately copy/paste to start flirty conversations with attractive women on apps like Tinder, Instagram, Facebook, and even in real life!

Proven through a decade of testing by my clients, myself, and soon you.

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becomeherman conversation starter

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