“What the f*uck is her problem that she doesn’t even have 2 seconds to tell me why she stopped texting me.”
Whenever I saw the dreadful Seen but no reply notification I wanted to smash my phone on the ground out of rage and disrespect.
Why do girls do that?
Why do they ghost you from one moment to the next?
Well, there are many reasons and some of them girls would be too terrified to tell you. And because there are so many reasons, I decided to dedicate two and not just one article about this topic.
Today, you’ll discover the 5 types of messages that can derail even the most exciting text conversation. And what simple texting tweaks you can do to diminish your chances of getting ghosted.
Plus: get your Popcorn ready because we’ll take a look at a model’s Insta DMs. After this post, you’ll know exactly what not to say, unlike most guys on Instagram.
Big shut out to Aleksandra, the wife of my client Nore, for giving us access to her Instagram account.
Without further ado, let’s begin…
Top 5 reasons why she stopped texting you
1. Using Sleazy Pick-up Lines
I get why so many guys have a never-ending craving for pick-up lines. You want 100% certainty she’ll reply and go on a date with you.
The good old logic of: “If it worked for him, why wouldn’t it work for me?”
I remember many years ago I bought a book including all sorts of pick-up lines you can use to meet girls online. Some sounded ridiculous to me, but I gave it a try. I had nothing to lose anyway because I had no dating life to speak of.
The results blew my mind. It actually worked, and I was getting replies. But not for long…
The book’s author didn’t mention that I wouldn’t be able to rely on his advice at some point. Eventually, I had to keep the conversation going using my own words. So after I ran out of his material, I started to text without his guiding hand. Always with the same result, I got myself a one-way ticket to Ghost Town.
Probably the girls thought I had a split personality disorder. That they were texting with Doctor Jackel and Mr. Hyde. Zero consistency throughout the entire conversation.
That’s why my texting advice works hand in hand with your personality. Because you won’t get and keep the girl you want by imitating me.
2. Sending A Boring Text
Sending boring messages is a surefire way to get her to stop replying. The question now is, how can you judge if your text messages are boring or not?
There are two things you can do to avoid sending boring text messages.
First: Before you hit send, ask yourself what are the odds she has already read the exact same message 1000s of times before?
The best example is sending a “hi” as the first message. Quite likely, 10 guys just today texted her “hi” already. So why should she answer if tomorrow 10 more guys will send her the same message?
Second: Talk with her about the #1 scientifically proven topic she can’t get enough of. No, it’s not shoes, clothes, or a new girlie TV show on Netflix. The one thing she is the most interested in is herself.
Step away from the small talk as fast as possible. Instead, talk about what she likes to do in her free time, why she chose her career, etc.
3. Creeping Her Out
Some guys are getting way too sexual way too soon, which creeps her out and stops her from replying to them. Even if the guys just wanted to make a joke, you’ll rub a lot of girls the wrong way by spicing up your text conversation.
There is a place and a time for getting down and dirty, and more often than not, it’s definitely not your text conversation before you even met her. Thanks to slut shaming, most women have to keep up the good girl act in public. They’re playing an oscar worthy performance of the lady in the streets and wedding planner in the sheets.
They would never admit it, even if they want to sleep with you. Their biggest fear is being judged as too easy and losing your respect.
4. Sharing Too Much Information Too Soon
Would you like to be responsible for the emotional well-being of a stranger you haven’t met yet?
And if you don’t reply, that stranger might insult or threaten you.
Who wants that responsibility?
Women definitely don’t.
If you send her your entire life story in a single message, she’ll assume you’re already planning your guys’ wedding without knowing her.
And if she replies a bit late or sends you a short message, you might not handle it so well. Thus, many women choose to ignore you and don’t reply at all.
5. Insulting Her
I was texting this girl back and forth, and everything was going great. She liked me, and I liked her, but then silence. A typical 21st-century love story… boy meets girl, girl ignores boy, boy gets pissed off at girl:
“How hard can it be to not take 2 seconds out of your day to reply to my messages? Who she thinks she is, that b*tch.”
In the end, my anger got the best of me…
So I texted her: “I thought everything was going well, and now you give me the silent treatment. Who do you think you are? Disrespecting me like this, you total b*itch.”
She replied two days later: “I had a car accident and was in the hospital. F*ck you!”
I felt like an idiot and messed up my chance because I let my anger get the best of me.
Learn from my mistake and keep your cool no matter how angry you are. There’s a tip from Abraham Lincoln you can use whenever you’re mad at a girl. Every time he was pissed, he wrote what he called a Hot Letter. No, it wasn’t a letter explaining in detail what he wanted to do to his wife at night.
A hot letter was an angry letter addressed to whoever he was mad at. Imagine a letter full of uncensored and unfiltered 19th-century swearwords.
But once he finished it, he never sent it. He kept the letter in his drawer. So if you feel overwhelmed by anger and frustration, do it like good old Abe. Write how you feel but never send it to her.
What to text when a girl isn’t responding?
You now have an overview of the top 5 reasons why girls stop replying to you. The best part is that everything you discovered today is within your control. Avoid the same texting mistakes most guys make, and you’ll be less likely ghosted. It’s simple as that.
Now, the top 5 reasons are just the tip of the iceberg. There are many more reasons women will stop texting you even if you’ve had the most interesting conversation in the world.
What? So how can I protect myself 100% from ever getting ghosted?
The short answer is you can’t. Anyone who claims to never get ghosted is full of sh*t.
Want to hear a dirty little secret of mine?
I get ghosted all the time. But it doesn’t bother me because I understand why I get ghosted and what to do about it. This way, I’m never surprised by it. I expect it to happen. I get excited like a hungry street dog seeing a bone because it means I’m very close to taking her on a date.
The mission, if you choose to accept it:
Find out the reasons why a woman would ghost you even if you had an interesting conversation. And discover how you can get her to reply and invest more in the conversation after she ghosts you.
Stay tuned for next week’s post.
Your Efficient Dating Advisor,
Herman The German