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How to turn on a girl: 5 ways to instantly get her in the mood

How to turn on a girl: 5 ways to instantly get her in the mood

If you’ve ever wondered how to turn a woman on, look no further. In this article you’ll discover the 5 key principles to turn up the heat between you and her (especially principle 3 and 4 for instant results). Keep reading…

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How to turn on a girl: 5 ways to instantly get her in the mood

Before we talk about how to turn on a girl, let’s look at how men get turned on by contrast. Do you know the answer? It’s simple: Show him a naked woman. As men, we’re basically ready at any time. It’s kind of like we’re going to the cinema and skipping the story of a movie just to see the end. But women don’t work that way. 

For them, it’s more about the build-up towards sex. The story of the movie, so to say, before we see the end of it. In fact, science shows us that dopamine, serotonin (= happiness hormones), and oxytocin (= love and sex hormones) are released in anticipation of an event and not after. 

But still, there are a couple of things you can do to turn women on or even accelerate the process. Or in other words: fast forward the story so you reach the end faster. So in this post, you’ll learn the 5 best ways to turn a girl on. Let’s get right into it:

Table of Contents

1. Whispering in her ear (most women can’t get enough of it)


This one might sound weird, but depending on the situation it’s one of the best things you can do that turns women on. Here are a few examples:

Let’s say you’re on a date with her at some coffee place. You and her talk to each other, share stories, and it’s going well so far. Now, instead of talking to her like you would normally, you could say something like:

“What I’m about to tell you is kind of a big secret of mine… so I’ll just tell it to you.”

And you move closer and start to whisper close to her ear. If you think that’s too much, then that’s ok. Eventually, you’ll get comfortable doing such things. So let’s look at another, more comfortable environment for whispering. The nightclub. 

If you’re talking with a woman inside a nightclub, it’s totally normal to lean in closer. Otherwise, she couldn’t hear you due to the loud music. But what most men do wrong is not positioning their lips towards her ears while leaning in. 

Or, if standing next to her, they often tend to lean in closer while looking in the same direction as the woman… But you should look at her and get closer (if you can, look at her eyes)… because this way, you build the most sexual tension. That’s why it is important to learn how to create sexual tension if you want to turn a woman on. 

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2. Light touching to increase her sexual desire


Women naturally have more erogenous zones than men. Plus, they have more nerve endings in their sexual organs. So it’s no surprise that physical touch plays a huge factor in turning women on and giving them sexual pleasure. Also, it’s extremely important that she feels comfortable with your touch. 

Because think about it… if she is uncomfortable with you touching her, nothing more will ever happen. Kissing or sex would be total overkill for her at this point. So you always need to make sure she’s ok with you touching her. 

You do that by gradually building up the way you touch her. How do you do that? Give her a hug the first time you meet her on a date. Then, sit next to her when you’re drinking a coffee together, not in front of her. This way, it’ll be way easier for you to gradually increase the touching. 

Simply start touching her shoulder or her hands lightly as you’re talking to her. Touch her legs or knees… Or, if you feel ready, take her hand and play with it. But always look for her reaction.

If she feels uncomfortable, back off. Don’t force it. Just keep in mind that if she’s resistant to your touch, it doesn’t mean she’s not interested. In most cases, it just means she’s not ready yet. Keep talking to her and try again later. 

Because if you don’t touch her, she’ll sit there and start thinking, “Does he not like me? Is something wrong with me?”. So touch is super important to turn a woman on. 

And don’t worry if you’re not sure how to initiate touch during a date. It’s completely normal to overthink this at the beginning. The best tip I can give you in this situation is to simply admit to her that you feel nervous. For example, you could say: “I’ll be honest. I really want to take your hand, but I’m too nervous to just do it.”

3. Eye contact, if done right


You’ve probably heard the following quote before: “The eyes are the windows to the human soul.” 

But what does that really mean? The reason why eye contact is so effective is that it can create sexual tension immediately without you doing anything other than looking into her eyes. 

No need to get to know her first before you can start touching or whispering with her. It gives you the ability to create sexual attraction from the first second you meet her. Sounds quite overpowered, right?

Because it is, once you know how to use it correctly. But most guys make eye contact wrong. They tend to look at her eyes for a few seconds, and as soon as it starts feeling “awkward,” they turn their heads away.

The real problem isn’t that it feels awkward, but rather that you don’t feel comfortable with the tension that builds up once you hold eye contact for an extended time. 

So the next time you’re talking with a girl, try to hold eye contact for a little longer than usual. Trust me, just a few minutes will make all the difference in the world. And the more you practice this, the more comfortable you’ll feel. 

This will give you a huge advantage over other guys since most of them can’t hold eye contact very long. And she’ll think you’re really confident in yourself for being able to hold such intense eye contact. To get the maximum effect, combine it with…

4. Talking slowly to trigger her sexual arousal


If you want to know how to turn a woman on, you need to work on your tonality and the way you talk. Here’s a fun experiment you can do. 

The next time you talk to someone, try waiting a few seconds before you answer. Just count to 3 or 5 in your head. What happens in most cases is that the person you’re talking to will start talking again before a single word leaves your lips.

The reason for that is the same as with eye contact. People feel uncomfortable with silence, especially on a date. Yet, if you’d practice being comfortable with it, a lot of things would change.

For example, most guys always think about what to say next to avoid that awkward silence on a date… but if you pause for a few seconds and look her in the eyes you can create a powerful sexual tension. 

In fact, most women would react to that by looking away or starting talking to reduce the tension. I can’t tell you how often I was sitting on a date, and the woman was basically doing all the talking because of that. 

All of a sudden, that “awkward silence” became one of the most fun things during a date because I knew if I did it right, she’d start blushing.

Side tip: Somen women associate how you talk with your ability to perform oral sex. For them, when you speak slowly, it’s a sign that you must be good in bed. Because you don’t rush things but instead take your time.

5. Make her feel relaxed and comfortable


For a woman to feel turned on and share her sexual feelings with you, she needs to feel relaxed and comfortable around you, especially during intercourse. And to be okay sleeping with you and admitting her sexual desires, she needs to trust you.

And trust is not only important for the first time you have sex with her but for your entire sexual relationship. Because you see, not all women can experience an orgasm while having sex with their man. Research shows that almost half of them either don’t orgasm or complain about not to orgasm enough through intercourse.

So if you want to help her reach an orgasm and think of you as the best lover she ever had, you need to help her let go and be present in the moment.

Because for women, according to famous sex researcher Alfred Kinsey, sex is about letting go as she has a much higher risk associated with sex. Namely, pregnancy. The way you gain her trust and make her feel comfortable with you is by building an emotional connection with her. 

Of course, there are times a woman you’ve just met wants to hop in bed with you and do wild sexual acts with you… but more often than not, you need to first establish a solid connection with her. 

So keep that in mind because, like I told you in the beginning, most guys would like to skip the story to see the end. But a woman needs to see the story to be ready for the end.

Your Efficient Dating Advisor,

Herman the German


Guten Tag, I’m Herman the German, original inventor of the Efficient Dating Systems Made in Germany.

I help smart, single men finally get and keep the girl they really want.

Using my background as a Frankfurt-trained financial engineer, I went on a quest to find dating patterns that truly work – my friends asked me to use my cold analytical skills to help them notice recurring patterns in their dating life.

This has been my single obsession since 2012.

Throughout my decade-long research, I was interviewed by German media, curious to know what I’d identified. And I was invited on many occasions to talk on stage as a guest expert – although I prefer the term life-long learner as I keep discovering new principles and techniques in my private practice.

As an introduction to my systems, I’m offering you to try my proven conversation starter template to make almost any woman interested in you, at no cost.

Claim your welcome gift now at: www.becomeherman.com/discover/

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